† RIP Renfield #684 – FINALLY HOCKEY ! †

† RIP Renfield #684 –  FINALLY HOCKEY !  †


***I PERSONALLY VOUCH FOR THE INTEGRITY, ACCURACY,
AND HONESTY OF ALL ITEMS  IN RIP***

(except for the stuff I make up, lie about,
or receive  mis-information about)


+++++++++++++++++++

Don’t be a stranger,   you can contact me  at…

RIPRenfield@aol.com
or
gary.renfield@gmail.com


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† RIP Renfield  # 684 –  FINALLY HOCKEY !  †

January 19, 2013


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Just when you got used to it
NOT being around…

The NHL ICE HOCKEY season appears !
It’ll be an abbreviated half-season,
getting any records or honors an asterisk,
but if it got my name on the
STANLEY CUP,
I’D TAKE IT  HAPPILY !!!

004 - stanley cup

With half as many games being played,
the season could turn out to be an exceptional one.

FRESHER, HUNGRIER PLAYERS
MIGHT JUST GIVE US EXCEPTIONAL EFFORT
ONCE THEY GET BACK IN-THE-GROOVE !

PLUS, THERE’S SUCH SHIT ON TV,
IT GIVES YOU ONE MORE OPTION !

005 - shit on tv

Having stumbled on to an opening game
on a saturday afternoon…
the
STANLEY CUP CHAMPS – LA KINGS
and the
CHICAGO BLACKHAWKS,
I caught a very ‘moving’ ceremony…

players presented with individual ‘rings’,
the Stanley Cup walked thru the crowd to the ice
(fans reaching for a ”touch’),
each player holding the ‘cup’ above their heads
to riotous cheers, survivors of a ‘Sandy Hook’ family
(along with Marcel Dion & Rogie Vachon)
walking the rolled-up overhead CUP banner to the captains,
and watching it unfurl as it was raised to the rafters.

Kinda chokes me up…
especially the reverence shown the STANLEY CUP.
What can I tell you…  I’M A FAN !!!

BRAGGING POINT
I never miss an opportunity to mention that I got to
touch the actual
STANLEY CUP a few years ago !

006 - 2003 me sooz stanley cup

(me and ‘the sooz’)
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R.I.P


Karl Malden

007 - RIP DEAD KARL MALDEN

Karl Malden was of Serbian-American descent.
Born with some ‘crazy’ serbian-cyrillic name
whose characters won’t type on my laptop !

His career spanned more than 7 decades !
(he made it to 97)
He performed in such classic films as…
A STREETCAR NAMED DESIRE
(oscar)
ON THE WATERFRONT
ONE-EYED JACKS
BABY DOLL
HOW THE WEST WAS WON
PATTON
but they say most known for tv’s
THE STREETS OF SAN FRANCISCO
(horrible show, why I hate Michael Douglas to this day)
I’d say he was more known (in the day) for
his distinctive AMERICAN EXPRESS commercials…
(oft parodied)

” DON’T LEAVE HOME WITHOUT IT ”

Tons of awards and honors…
including a star on the
HOLLYWOOD WALK OF FAME

008 - rest in peace KARL MALDEN

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CONGRATS ARE IN ORDER…

Perhaps due to the shortened (lockout)

ICE HOCKEY SEASON

I scored mt first NATIONAL HOCKEY LEAGUE point !

009 - hockey shot

I was cruising, mid-ice, well inside the ‘red line’,
while a scrum was going on in front of the opposition’s net.
Perfect defensive positioning on my part.
The puck came back to me (slowly) from a clearing move.
I put the puck just as carefully back to the front of the net
in a very straight line, where our centerman,
edge of the crease, in traffic, took my perfectly placed pass
(right on his stick),
and flipped it over the prone goalie !
(got the ‘point’ for my first assist ever)

010 - scrum front of net

IT WAS ONE OF THE BEST EARLY MORNING
DREAMS I EVER HAD (that didn’t involve a woman) !

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VIOLENCE   MORATORIUM…

011 - no violence circle logo

I’ve thought of a way to get kids away from the tv
and perhaps back outside again to amuse themselves.
(it may inconvenience non-insane adults though)
As an experiment, don’t show or rent any shows or movies
with violent content or bullying (hide the dvd’s too).

This will cut tv & theater content down by
at least 80%, the only place to go is outside !
If you want to claim QUENTIN TARANTINO
as an offender, also include
DISNEY !!!
(and that ‘horrible TOY STORY, CASABLANCA & WIZARD of OZ)

012 - old cartoon shoot

WHO DECIDES WHAT LEVEL OF VIOLENCE
IS SAFE & ACCEPTABLE ?

(they wouldn’t make them, if they didn’t sell BIG)

Tarantino is shielded from youngsters,
first go after the young mind influencer,
DISNEY !!!

I’m staying inside…

there’s always BARNEY !

013 - barney - dino
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SPEAKING OF WASHINGTON HYPOCRITES…

014 - liberal hypocrite

Why aren’t politicians ‘bothered’
with a barrage of papparazzi
whenever they make a move in DC ?

(plenty of bars, broads, & twinks… DUI’s too)

COULD IT BE FOR THEIR SECURITY ?
IT’S UNSAFE ?
AND THE PROHIBITION ENFORCED ?

It’s just as unsafe for celebs, photographers,
and innocent bystanders !
(Princess Di, Bieber’s photog)

WHERE’S THE FIRST AMENDMENT IN DC ?
Is it a ‘gentleman’s agreement’ ?
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Scientists Can’t Find Men

Who Don’t Watch Porn


The University of Montreal had to end a study which would
have required 20-something men who have never watched
pornography because they couldn’t find any. The study was to see
the differences in behavior between men who haven’t watched porn
and those who do. Well, they’re out of luck.
They’d be better off looking for the Holy Grail.

Read more at dailymail.co.uk.
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THANK GOD IT’S OVER…

I was sick & tired
of a week’s+ of constant reminders on tv
that
LANCE ARMSTRONG
is going to come clean about
‘doping’
(nee cheating) to obtain his lofty
championships in the stupid sport of

BICYCLE RACING !

015 - lance armstrong syringe


IF HE’S ADMITTING CHEATING… END OF STORY
IF HE’S NOT ? …  NO STORY !
A ‘NEW’ CAREER FOR HIM ?
I NEVER CARED FOR HIM & HIS SPORT BEFORE !

It’s a legit ’sport’ just like hopscotch is,
but not one of the more interesting ones.
Definitely not worthy of multi-millions of dollars
and a shower of rose petals for being the best.
PERSPECTIVE IS THE WORD THAT COMES TO MIND.

BACK to LANCE…
Will he or won’t he ?

WHO CARES ?
His ‘honors’ have been taken away…

HE’S A BITCH !!!

Not worthy of sympathy or a tv forum.
(I wonder if OPRAH’s paying for the ‘privilege’?)

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Lance didn’t come forward to confess
out of morality, or it being the right thing to do….

He confessed because he got caught !!!

AND IT WOULDN’T SURPRISE ME
IF HE’S ‘WORKING’ AN ANGLE
FOR FINANCIAL GAIN !!!
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CHAMPIONSHIPS TAKEN AWAY ?
If you’re that sorry,
I GUESS YOU’LL BE RETURNING
ALL THE ENDORSEMENT MONEY TOO !!!
(yeah, right)
Never could figure out why, & how, the Post Office
came up with $30 million to sponsor a sport
that plays much bigger over-seas ?

There are ’supposed’ negotiations going on
for Lance to pay back a portion.

A portion ?

How about $30 million PLUS damages !
(payback $10 million & still $20 million ahead)

I’d have tuned-in to the interview
but there was a PORKY PIG
cartoon marathon on at the same time.

PRIORITIES !

016 - porky pig- thats all folks

addendum…

HIS ‘weight’ is lifted ?

WHAT ABOUT THE HONORS, MONEY,
AND DAY-IN-THE-SUN
for the 2nd, 3rd, & 4th place finishers !!!

THINGS YOU JUST CAN’T MAKE RIGHT !!!
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HURRICANE SANDY

The
EMBARASING slowness & lack of aid
to the tri-state area may come back
to bite the gov’t in-the-ass for future disasters !

SHORT  SIGHTED ?

People are suffering !
ENTIRE NEIGHBORHOODS HAVE BEEN DEVASTATED !
It’s kinda cold outside and victims,
and their children, are living in tents
or entire families crammed into 1 room
temporary housing, with no end-game in sight !

Funny how aid seemed more urgent to the aid-givers
BEFORE the election !!!

This is quite a populated area,
taxed way more than they get back,
and also very generous to ANY cause,
or disaster, anywhere in the world !

I can see a backlash where people
won’t be so quick to give, or as generous.
In addition, people are experiencing a ‘poverty’
they’ve not faced before,
and will be ’subtracting’, not adding, to the tax rolls !

MAYBE IF WE CHANGED THE NAME FROM
NEW JERSEY to NEW BIAFRA…

THAT MIGHT SPEED THINGS UP !

The MAFIA would have rebuilt by now !
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LANCE & OPRAH ?

Bad luck all around…

017 - no oprah coffee cup


Disappointing interview (so I heard)…
Lance coming across as arrogant, emotionless, a victim?,
and seeming to look for redemption
that would open ‘financial doors’ to him !

OPRAH ?

Very off-the-radar since moving to her OWN Network.
A good showing from Lance’s appearance
could get her needed attention as the go-to girl !
People might even remember her channel number
on their cable or satellite systems !
(could she have paid for the ‘privilege’?)

BIG MESS ALL THE WAY AROUND !

018 - cast call - 1 big mess


They DO get some attention from media outlets,
but bad timing,
the ‘hotter’ sports story (pushing Lance out)
is the UNTOLD aspects of

NOTRE DAME’s TE’O
and his phony online girlfriend !

019 - teo and gf pic

WAS HE STUPID (real stupid) or CUNNING (or both) ?

Continue-ing the deception AFTER he’s
known to have the lowdown (for personal gain?).
KILLING HER OFF !
Was he ‘catfished’ or was it his ‘beard’
to hide his homosexuality ?
(not that there’s anything wrong with being gay)

TILL HE COMES ‘CLEAN’ (if he does)
THE INTEREST & SPECULATION WILL CONTINUE !

(for about 2 weeks max, till something else comes along)

YEP…

TE’O SURE STOLE LANCE’S THUNDER !!!

LANCE P. ARMSTRONG
( ‘P’  for  PARIAH )
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ESCALATOR  WOES…

020 escalator - death trap

You may, or may not of heard of the
escalator accident in a NYC subway station.

Blamed on salt water damage from
HURRICANE  SANDY  kicking in…

A long, crowded escalator switched directions
with no warning & resulted in over 70 injuries !

I CAN’T GET MY MIND AROUND THE STUPIDITY !
Direction unexpectedly changes,
you bump or stumble into the person in front of you,
you straighten yourself, turn around,
and ride the escalator down to the bottom.

NO BIG DEAL !

021 - escalator ok

INSTEAD…

People panic, attempt to climb over each other,
push, shove, jump to adjoining escalators…
(no explosion, no fire, lights still on)

AND GET INJURED IN THE MEANTIME !

022 - escalator - crash

WHAT   FRIGGIN’  ‘MAROONS’ !!!
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HEY  NORTON !!!

023 - ed norton sewer

My ‘weapon’ of choice for computer safety has been
NORTON  ANTI-VIRUS.
When I needed to supply protection
for 2 other laptops in the house
I moved up to…
NORTON  INTERNET  SECURITY
(3 computers allowed on one subscription)
I got protection, but it turned my computer into a ’snail’
after the first upgrade to a newer version.
I thought the problem elsewhere at first,
putting it off to an old computer.

Finally ‘googling’ after a couple of years of annoyance,
I found out it was a common ‘xp’ problem.
Symantec techs blamed it on insufficient RAM.

WELL…

(years later, living with the problem, pricing RAM)
The NIS became disabled after a SYSTEM RESTORE.
Customer support took control remotely
and re-installed, using the newest version of NIS.

Lo and behold…

It’s mah-velous !  Like a new computer !
I figure it was losing them business
so they accommodated us ‘xp’ lovers.

I NOW RECOMMEND IT.

024 - sewer manhole cover
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025 - ad forgot hits kk

http://forgottenhits60s.blogspot.com/

THIS  IS  DA  PLACE !!!
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FINALLY !!!!

A SUSAN  LUCKEY WIKIPEDIA  PAGE !!!

(from the RENFIELD COLLECTION)

026 - susan luckey collage - renfield


As brief as it is, at least it’s something.
The internet has been around for a decade or so,
so I found the omission very insulting !

(I was tempted to start one myself)

There are obvious (to me) areas
that I could expand & ‘fluff out’ for the listing,
but most of my knowledge came from interaction
with
SUZIE and I don’t think it’s my place
to take those to an internet that they’ve been
kept away from
(and quite successfully).

027 - susan luckey - carousel -  sit beach

GONNA MISS YOU LOTS

FOR A LONG, LONG TIME

MISS  SUZIE
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WELL, I GUESS I’M DONE…

It’ll give you more time to shovel & sweep
the snow off the lake ice…

028 - zamboni

Too bad no one runs a drive-by

ZAMBONI business !

(like a snow plow business)

029 - thin ice sink

(maybe not such a good idea)

Hmmm…
that just reminded me of the
mini-carnival rides on trucks
that used to ‘work’ the neighborhood
when I was a kid.  They’d drive thru like the
ice cream truck trying to make you part with your dime.

HOW DO YOU GET A PERMIT or INSURANCE
FOR DEATHTRAPS LIKE THOSE !!!

030 - the whip- on truck

There was ‘the whip’(above), the ferris wheel’,
and that ‘rocker thing’ you still see in amusement parks.
There may have been more choices, that’s all I remember.

031 - ferris wheel- on truck

BUT FORGET THAT !
LOOK BELOW IF YOU MISSED IT…

I GOT TO TOUCH LORD STANLEY’s CUP !!!



ADIEU-

032 - rip bottom us stanley cup
____________________

COMMENTS ABOUT R.I.P. RENFIELD???

Opposing opinions are welcome,
but since I’m the only employee of RIP,
you could be wasting your time…

*******************************

OCCASION RIP BANNERS
& ‘SPECIAL’ GRAPHICS PROJECTS
by staff artist

TISH (PILLBUG)
——————————

>>>>>TELL YOUR FRIENDS<<<<<

(or not, I really don’t care)

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About the Author

Me? I'm just your average, opinionated, witty, talented-type person... (someone you'd run away from in person, but makes for entertaining reading)... From my lair in New Jersey, I pass my 'judgement' on the world around me... inserting (original) humor where it's applicable... 10 years of ME every week !!! and still going strong... WHEN WILL THIS GUY SNAP ? Check in weekly so you can witness the 'crash-and-burn'... It HAS to be soon !!!