† RIP Renfield #623 – FOOTBALL – sort of †

***I PERSONALLY VOUCH FOR THE INTEGRITY, ACCURACY,
AND HONESTY OF ALL ITEMS  IN RIP***

(except for the stuff I make up, lie about,
or receive  mis-information about)

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Don’t be a stranger,   you can contact me  at…

RIPRenfield@aol.com
or
gary.renfield@gmail.com

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† RIP Renfield  # 623 – FOOTBALL, sort of… †

September 24, 2011

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MORE  ON  MY  HEALTH  EMERGENCY  LATER…

but for now…

I’m going LAZY, a big pic-type issue…

FOOTBALL, FANTASY FOOTBALL,

ANY KIND OF FOOTBALL

is now here to take your mind
off your miserable life in this miserable economy !

IMAGINE THE MOOD OF THE COUNTRY
WITHOUT THIS DISTRACTION !!!

(I’m not a fan, don’t keep up at all, I see things clearer)
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AT LEAST THIS WEEK’S BANNER
is ALL Football and Football shaped ‘things’…
the banner is in recognition of that impossible catch
on the way to the recent NY Giant’s Superbowl Win.
(the football is the one in the middle)

TOO BAD SHE CALLED FOR A ‘FAIR CATCH’…
the pile-on might have been fun !
(even ‘touch’ football would have been fun)

Those pile-ups?   You could end up being ‘felt up’ !
Well, that’s what happened to ME anyway !
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R.I.P

Songwriter Nick Ashford

of Ashford & Simpson



Nick Ashford was 1/2 of the legendary Motown songwriting duo
Ashford & Simpson that penned elegant, soulful classics
for Diana Ross, Marvin Gaye, Chaka Khan, and others.

They had some of their greatest success at Motown
with classics like “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough”
and “Reach Out And Touch Somebody’s Hand” by Ross
& “You’re All I Need To Get By” by Gaye & Tammi Terrell.

They also had success writing for themselves,
The biggest known hit sung by them was the 1980s hit
“Solid As A Rock.”

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RENFIELD’S HEALTH

TAKES A NOSE-DIVE !!!

I mentioned last week my ER visit
and near-week-long hospital stay
because of BLOOD CLOTS in my LUNGS
(and both calves)

(see what happens when NOT drained (bitten) regularly?)

ANY exertion and I was huffing & puffing
like I would collapse… (heart attack came to mind).
I was diagnosed pretty quickly from blood work,
but still spent 9 hours in the ER until I got to a room !

I got a pretty good check-up….

CAT-SCAN, ECHO-GRAM, VASCULAR ULTRA-SOUND,
A HEART CATHERIZATION, BLOOD WORK 4 TIMES A DAY,
A CONSTANT HEPARIN DRIP, HAD TO INJECT MYSELF
WITH LOVANOX, & WENT HOME ON COUMADIN
(a 6 month series) TO DISSOLVE THE CLOTS !

Plenty of clots, but I got a great DVD of the inside
of my heart… and a high-pass on my heart…
no damage, no heart attack, no clot, no stent…
(although they made me sign off on open heart surgery
if the test showed I needed it)
THEY WENT THRU MY WRIST INSTEAD OF ABDOMEN.

So now I’m resting comfortably… not in pain…
but not cured by any means… gonna take time…
I have weekly doctor visits for blood work
to get the coumadin level correct…

AND THEN HOPE FOR THE BEST !

If CLOTS don’t kill you right off,
they’re supposed to be pretty cure-able.

(VERY BORING, I’D BE BETTER OFF IF I COULD WORK)

ADDENDUM…
I was all ‘hooked-up’ in the hospital,
dying for a shower… the soapy towel wasn’t doing it…
my hair was a mess & I’ve ’smelled’ less !
I get home… finally get to a shower… IT’S GLORIOUS !
When I step out of the shower (no slipping) ?
I can’t figure out how… but I ‘threw-out’ something
in my back, and it’s going to bother me for a few days !
LUCKY  ME !!!
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WOW…

NAKED GIRLS & FOOTBALL ?

Throw in a coupon for a 6-pack of beer
and these will fly off the shelf !!!

(plus there’s always the great articles)
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DREAMS

I had 2 the nite BEFORE I went to the hospital.

The first might have been premontory…

I was talking to a few men who were standing
behind boxes, more than it a regular desk.
It might have been outside…
They want to ‘draw’ blood from me,
but it has to be taken in a special way.
Next thing, I’m in the pilot seat of an airliner,
but it’s supposed to be a space shuttle.
The co-pilot has a russian accent
and asks me ‘why we are going up?’.
I point to the inside ‘crook’ of my right elbow,
tap it, and say ‘for a blood draw’…
He’s astounded, but before he can say anything,
I start the ’shuttle’ down a dirt road (with wheel ruts)
across a field… for a ‘15 second burn’,
when we get to the end, I pull back on the controls,
and we do an ‘8 second burn’ straight up…

THEN  I  WAKE

Soon after that ‘cool’ dream… I had another…
And I can’t tell if my perceptions of dreaming it
in the past are accurate…

I remembered how last year, or years before,
I regularly dreamed of driving to a destination
that I kinda always had trouble finding…
I dream the drive… thru a town I mistakenly label
as Westfield, NJ… make more than a few turns
to get to this ‘park’… I’ve walked in it sometimes…
a long walk to these rock outcroppings,
and a lake of sorts past that…
But if I pass the park and continue on…
I enter a residential neighborhood,
go to a specific house where they know me,
and hang out with the family(?).
I think I stopped going because,
in the dream,  after (supposed) years ‘visiting’ there,
I gained enought weight that I had problems
buckling my jeans… I even tried to re-start
my jogging regimen in the dreams…
(the ‘tricky’ drive home is another long story)

IN MY WAKING STATE…

I remembered dreaming this ‘location’ in the past,
but not lately… but the way I remember it…
I’ve spend alot of ‘dream’ time with these people,
at this particular place…  (but stopped 2 or 3 of years ago)

KINDA  SPOOKY

Perhaps  I’m  ‘visiting’  someplace  real !!!
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WHETHER HOT & SWEATY AFTER THE GAME,
OR  YOU  HAVE  SALTY-ASS FROM  THE  BEACH….

EVEN THOUGH…

It’s not time to ’shower-up’ yet…

I love this pic when it comes to showers
and I couldn’t resist… (from the archives)

THEY know how to shower !!!

(and please an audience to boot)

DOES THAT LOOK LIKE

A GOOD TIME, OR WHAT ?
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I’m sure MORE evil minds than mine
have already considered this option…
so I bring this to YOUR attention
for YOUR consideration…

IS ANYONE BESIDES ME

WORRYING ABOUT THESE

DRONE ATTACK PLANES ?

We take them in stride as they go on their
‘deadly’ missions overseas,
controlled by 9-to-5 guys in Nevada & Texas…

BUT

What’s to stop the ‘bad guys’ from getting hold
of the technology and bringing it home to us ?

They don’t necessarily need FULL-SIZED aircraft.
A smaller version (kept in a garage),
with a ’smaller’ tech package, for a limited range,
could cause some real terror & damage
RIGHT  HERE  IN  RIVER  CITY !!!
(we already have remote-controlled ‘toy’ aircraft in stores)

Small, low-speed, low altitude ‘missiles’
could be impossible to defend against !
(and WE created the technology)

I’M HOPING THOSE IN CHARGE
HAVE A VIABLE DEFENSE PLAN
AND NOT JUST CROSSING-THEIR-FINGERS
AND HOPING FOR THE BEST !!!

Saving a national monument by shooting a missle

down over a populated area isn’t a win !

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the PLAYBOY CLUB
(tv series)

I taped this show for one of the boring times
of my convalescence when nothing was on…
I finally watched it…(only took 2 days of waiting)…

I was sort of expecting a ‘fun’ show…
lots of tits-and-ass, light fare,
kinda like ‘Vegas’ or ‘LOVE BOAT’.

BUT IT TURNS OUT TO BE A MOB SHOW…
(circa late 50’s, early 60’s)
A wannabe ‘Sopranos’ or ‘BOARDWALK EMPIRE’
that needs regular and concentrated viewing,
and I’m NOT ready to make the commitment !

AND REALLY.. IN THIS DAY AND AGE…
DO YOU REALLY THINK A BUNNY COSTUME
WILL TURN ANYONE ON, OR BE A DRAW ?

The show MIGHT be a good alternate on a bad nite…
it’s set in Chicago… nice local touches…
like THE (famous) PUMP ROOM mention…
but the mob story is interspersed with
club musical acts & ‘bunny training & problems.
ALONG WITH AN EPILOG
shot from behind Hefner’ hair to fill out the hour.
LOTS  OF  FLUFF !!!
(plus it’s shot ‘very dark’)

THE ONLY THING THAT WOULD GET ME TO WATCH
WOULD BE A LACK OF ANYTHING ELSE ON…
(and then I’d still check out re-runs)
A ‘VEGAS’ clone might have been the way to go !

(that’s what I’m expecting the Pan Am show to be)
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IF YOU BET…

A ‘HOT’ tip for the football season…



PUT  YOUR  MONEY  ON

SHANE   FALCO

I can tell she knows what she’s saying
by the look in her eyes…

(hey Renfield, her ‘eyes’ are up here)
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I know I SUSAN LUCKEY’d you out last issue.
It could have been the Susan Luckey Issue…

but the strangest thing happened…
(just like it did with Kellie M years ago)
SHE POPPED-UP
OUT OF NOWHERE !
(and quite the coincidence I would catch it)



I turn on the tv (remember? I’m bored)…
and on ANTENNA TV they are just showing
the last half-minute of the routine
BURNS & ALLEN (1956)
do after every show…
THEN THEY GO TO THE CREDITS…
Over the written credits are the voice-over credits…
(cheaper than making new ‘boards’?)

AND I HEAR…

“…and SUZANNE LUCKEY (same person)
playing the role of  MADELINE !!!…”

So there IS work she is un-credited for !

I didn’t get to see her… (I’ll be looking out)
but neither did   www.IMDB.com
Seems I found an over-sight in their database listings !!!
ACTUALLY EXCITING PUTTING IN AN ADDITION !!!

So I put in 2 submissions…

One for an acting credit.
One for a ’show’ credit…

(Burns&Allen-’the girl at the perfume counter’)
AND THEY FOUND ONE MORE B&A CREDIT !

So, IF accepted (and why not?)…
I’ll have a ‘connection’ with her from a fan
and gotten her an additional IMDB credit !
(THEY WERE ACCEPTED, I GOT 2 IMDB CREDITS !!!)

MIGHT NOT SOUND LIKE MUCH…
BUT IT’S AS CLOSE TO HER AS I’M EVER GOING TO GET !

(and I’m curious to see if she starts popping up elsewhere)
((that’s how it happens with me))
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whew…

I just got the word on the drug I’ll be taking

for the next 6 months or more…

(from USERS not DOCTORS)

COUMADIN (warfarin)

Seems it’s the active ingredient in RAT POISON !
Makes them bleed out on the inside.
NOTHING WORSE THAN A HEMOPHILIAC RAT !!!
(I believe it inhibits making of ‘clotting factor’)

The news?

DON’T CUT YOURSELF !!!

Brush a bush, scratch yourself,
and leave a trail of blood from yard-to-driveway…
since you won’t feel it…
(and probably ruin your clothes)

WHAT’S MY ALTERNATIVE ?

IT’S EASY WHEN YOU HAVE NO CHOICE !!!

I guess I’ll be giving up KNIFE-JUGGLING for a while…
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SORRY…

I can’t have girls in the shower

without a pic that’s ‘called’ to me for years…

I LOVE THIS SHOT…


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addendum

Just happened to have BURNS & ALLEN
on again the day after the SUSAN LUCKEY siting…
and got to see her more real-to-life, not as a ‘character’ !
(she played the same character in at least 2 episodes)
(I’m wondering if you had to date son Ronnie Burns to get on.)

THERE SHE WAS AGAIN !!!
(quickly got it on tape, and on to my ’special’ reel)
I’m thinking she may pop up here and there
as the girlfriend (or flirt) for son, RONNIE BURNS.

SHE’S ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL !!!

(elegant, sophisticated, & well-spoken… AND acting skills)

Ronnie kept her angled so he could steal the scene,
he’s a real camera ‘hog’,
but Susan, a real ‘pro’, was able to ’steal back’
by throwing in a leisurely, full-faced spin !
(no dummy her)
SHE COULDA-SHOULDA BEEN A STAR !!!
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I’ve ALWAYS have the same

reaction to this picture…

WHAT  THE  HECK  IS
HOLDING  UP  HER  SHORTS ?

Is she able to walk around in them
without them falling down ?
(I’m constantly (just) ‘hiking-up’ MY pants)

I’ve always been mystified how
some women’s clothing stays up…
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AND LASTLY…

CHEERLEADERS

An integral part of the game & team spirit !



’nuff  said…
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this  week’s NEW tv…

(IN A NUTSHELL)

THE MENTALIST CAME IN A WINNER !
even with the red-john nonsense.

PERSON OF INTEREST
good first story, worth another look !
(think Batman, Batman voice & no ‘bat-stuff’)

PRIME SUSPECT
big bad men needing capable woman to prove herself,
and she can’t… ass kicked by perp, man saves her…
(yawn)
Is the the 1970’s?  Ever hear of HR?
She’d have them in court so fast their heads would spin !
(in a court case? an easy million or 2)

CSI – with Ted Danson?
better than the last 2 guys…

UNFORGETTABLE
like I said before, forget it !

BODY OF PROOF
another cop-coroner show,
divorced working mom home story doesn’t turn me on…
but it wasn’t bad…  I’ll watch again.

CASTLE
I watched a marathon while in the hospital,
enjoyed it till they switched to 2nd season
(should have never changed HER look),
the new one this past week was un-watch-able.

PLAYBOY CLUB
didn’t grab me, 60’s mob show.
might be because a friend of mine, a cop,
did security in chicago and his opinion
was that the mansion was sleazy,
and the guests even sleazier…
I’d rather the glitzy lie for the story but it’s
MORE HYPE THAN SUBSTANCE !
(you’d need to invest alot of time to keep up)

A GIFTED MAN
I guess you always need a ghost-whisperer clone.
The pilot was decent, but the show would be better
without the ghost & all it entails
and leaning too heavily on making a prick a goody-goody.
The hospital setting was interesting enough, a good look !

PAN AM
might be a love-boat in the sky…
or they might be shooting for a MAD-MEN in the sky…
haven’t seen it yet.

I’LL HAVE A FEW SHOWS TO AMUSE ME
I GUESS THAT’S ALL YOU CAN HOPE FOR.
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(WHISTLE)

CALLING FOR A MEASUREMENT
(looks like a 34C to me)

NOPE… DIDN’T MAKE A FIRST DOWN !
(or to 1st base)

CLOCK RUNS OUT…



GAME OVER

RIP RENFIELD OVER TOO !!!

FINAL CALL…

Hit the Showers !!!

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(soon to be 13th year)

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COMMENTS ABOUT R.I.P. RENFIELD???

Opposing opinions are welcome,
but since I’m the only employee of RIP,
you could be wasting your time…

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OCCASION RIP BANNERS
& ‘SPECIAL’ GRAPHICS PROJECTS
by staff artist
TISH (PILLBUG)
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>>>>>TELL YOUR FRIENDS<<<<<

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