† RIP Renfield #532 – HAPPY NEW YEAR †

***I PERSONALLY VOUCH FOR THE INTEGRITY, ACCURACY,
AND HONESTY OF ALL ITEMS IN RIP***

(except for the stuff I make up, lie about,
or receive mis-information about)

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Don’t be a stranger,  you can contact me at…
RIPRenfield@aol.com

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† RIP Renfield #532 – HAPPY NEW YEAR †
December 26, 2009

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PARTY TIME FOR NEW YEAR’S EVE

AT CASA de RENFIELD

I got each of the 4 cats their own
CAT-NIP LACED TOY for Xmas !!!

THEY’RE HAVING A BLAST !!!

Must be me, but…
I pushed that damn toy mouse
around with my nose for half-an-hour…
and it did NOTHING for me !!!

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a little love everybody…
it seems appropriate to enter the new year
with a little thank you to a BIG helper…

the ‘reaper’ I’ve adopted as my corporate identity
(as you’ve seen in every issue of RIP for years)
was skillfully created for me by…

TISH (pillbug)

I’d like to thank her for this, and ALL her hard work
over the years that ‘raised-my-game’ significantly
by her MANY graphical contributions to RIP !

TIP-O-THE-HAT, O SKILLFUL ONE !!!

(and DAVE, SUNSET COWBOY is no slouch either
check out his projects (sites) listed in RIP ads)

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MY LAPTOP COMPUTER ?
That’s the powerhouse 17 inch Toshiba
that I bought 5 years ago…

I treat it like gold, take no chances with it’s safety.
I still have the shipping (sticky) plastic on the case.
I FINALLY got annoyed with a mark on the screen
that I couldn’t remove with a dry tissue…
SO I DIPPED THE TISSUE IN SOME WINDOW CLEANER…
FIRST TIME EVER…

WOW… WHAT  DIFFERENCE !!!
It wasn’t marked or dirty… but the colors seem sharper !

REMINDS ME OF MY MINI-VAN…
I get crap for keeping it…    Everyone else in my household
has switched cars several times in the last 18…
but I insist I’m keeping it for 20 years !
(I’m on  mission from God)
It has only 2 years to go to reach 20…
(I might go for 25)

Vandals scratched up my hood 10 or 12 years ago…
and I had to have it re-painted.
It was summertime and I was instructed to NOT wash it
for 3 or 4 weeks to let the paint dry real good.

WELL… 12 YEARS LATER ?

IT’S NOT BEEN ‘OFFICIALLY’ WASHED IN ALL THAT TIME !!!
and it just doesn’t seem dirty to me…
the paint has faded a bit… looks like a matte finish…
(I’ve gotten compliments)

BUT I’M JUST A GUY WHO CAN FOLLOW INSTRUCTIONS !!!
(and not take unnecessary chances)

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Your MORNING SHOWER… ahhhhh

Soothing, refreshing…
tempted to stay in longer than you should…
AT TIMES A VERY ENJOYABLE EXPERIENCE
(alone or with company)

BUT… as pleasant as a shower can be…
How many times have you gotten into your bathing suit
(or naked in your private yard),
and gone out to stand or sit in a rain shower ?
(outside showering after the beach doesn’t count)
GO AHEAD.. ENJOY YOURSELF IN THE RAIN !

Except for fictional movies with brain-dead lovers
walking hand-in-hand in the rain…
HAVE YOU EVER CONSIDERED BEING
CAUGHT IN THE RAIN AN ENJOYABLE EXPERIENCE ?

IT’S MORE LIKE…

GOT CAUGHT IN THE RAIN ?
BETTER GO INSIDE AND TAKE A SHOWER !!!

(and that’s all I have to say about THAT)

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HEALTHCARE  PLAN  ?

This healthcare plan has been an abortion
from the beginning. Perhaps NOW it’s taking shape ?

Shouldn’t MOST of the ‘objection-able’ issues (dirty work)
been worked-out BEFORE presented for vote?
How this enormously complex plan could be considered
Obama’s plan is beyond me !
He wasn’t in office long enough to come up with it !!!
So they took whatever they had
and tried to jam it down the throats of the country !
(AS IS, instead of 70-80% accomplished)

How about them taking their time, working on it,
and presenting it when it only needed ‘fine-tuning’
instead of major re-working with negotiations in the press !

IT WAS DONE HALF-ASSED !!!
and really brought down confidence in our leader !

Obama is a nice-guy, not a scrapper…

HE’S NOT FIGHTING, HE’S ACQUIESCING !!!


Put it this way…
If you were in management…
You’d LOVE to have a ‘NICE’ boss like Obama !
If you were the head of a company,
looking for ‘hungry’ managers…
OBAMA (and his style) WOULD NOT BE YOUR CHOICE !!!
You’d want someone who motivates, not make friends !

(I’m just sayin’)

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The ‘CRUEL’ EYE CHART

for older guys… AARP

” Wahhhhhhhhh !!! “

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I’M CONFUSED ABOUT A PUBLIC SERVICE
COMMERCIAL THEY’VE BEEN SHOWING IN TV…
(there have been several versions)

In one.. a woman is sitting at her desk at work,
and while conducting business,
starts mixing a fancy alcoholic drink in a blender…

AND THE LESSON IS…
YOU DON’T ALWAYS NEED TO SMOKE WHILE YOU DRINK,
SINCE YOU DON’T HAVE TO DRINK WHILE YOU SMOKE…
(or something like that)

I’M BAFFLED !!!
Are they asking you to NOT smoke while you become an alcoholic ?
That drinking is a better vice than smoking ?

CAN WE EXPECT ADS FROM THE OTHER SIDE ?
SMOKE, DON’T DRINK, TO AVOID ALCOHOL PROBLEMS ?

ALSO…
You don’t need to smoke after sex ?

(in jerry seinfeld voice)

” WHAT ARE THEY TRYING TO SAY ? “

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GET OFF HER BACK

LET THE KID SMOKE…
(NO ALCOHOL THOUGH)

IT RELAXES HER…
PUTS HER IN A ‘GOOD’ FRAME OF MIND…



A FEW MORE DRAGS…

SHE’S GETTING THERE…



WHEW… SHE MIGHT BE RELAXED,

BUT I’M HOT & BOTHERED !!!

DAMN, one more cigarette should do it…
AND SHE’S OUT !!!


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from porn stars to…

PAWN STARS…
I finally saw what the show was all about…
the merchandise brought in,
and the ‘gamble’ whether it’s real or not,
reasonably repairable or not,
is entertaining to watch…

MY QUESTION IS…
WHY WOULD ANYONE USE A PAWN BROKER
TO SELL MERDANDISE UNLESS IT WAS STOLEN ?
(they only offer a percentage of it’s worth)

WHY NOT PHONE EXPERTS OR INTERESTED PARTIES,
OR GET AN ESTIMATE ON A REPAIR,
AND SELL IT OUT-RIGHT, FULL-VALUE ?

Bottom-line ?
YOU CAN ALWAYS TRY EBAY !!!


Years ago I had a Canon camera I wanted repaired,
hoping it was minor, I went to a local camera shop.
(when they were run by camera-experts)
The old guy told me that if HE repaired it
he would charge so-much for a half-hour labor,
plus the cost of parts…
IF I wanted Canon to repair it…
it would cost a certain amount,
PLUS his fee for being the middleman !!!
(reminiscent of pawn shop tactics)

DUH… I said thanks but no thanks…
contacted Canon Camera by myself,
AND SAVED THE CAMERA SHOP GUY’S CUT !!!

IT ONLY MADE SENSE !!!
Except for loans on merchandise to be redeemed,
I can’t see why ANYONE would sell to a pawn shop !

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just to straighten out you heathens
who never thought to question…

THE 12 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS ?

They start on Xmas day
and the 12th day is January 5th,
the eve of the Epiphany !!!

NOT THE 12 DAYS LEADING TO XMAS
usually used as a convention in holiday lore…


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MUSIC, MUSIC, MUSIC

PLAY THE WEEKLY 2-FER…
NAME THAT TUNE QUIZ !!!
——
dave, the exiled !!!

http://en.davidscott.de/
GO TO THE SOURCE, FOLLOW THE LINK

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I work outside alot…
and I’ve noticed something very strange…
ALONG WITH THE ODD WEATHER…
It hasn’t been getting dark as early as it used to !!!
and I’m talking pre-solstice…
It seems to me that the evening sunlight,
the days, have been getting longer
much sooner than they should have !

ARE WE HAVING ORBITAL PERTURBATIONS
OR BEEN KNOCKED OFF OUR AXIS ?

VERY STRANGE…
(and I don’t think it’s me… well, not this time anyway)

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and lastly (on this rant)

WHO GIVES A 3 YEAR OLD A GIFT,
A TOY, THAT REQUIRES BATTERIES,
AND DOESN’T PROVIDE THE BATTERIES ?
(it kinda takes the glitz off your gift if un-use-able)

We babysat my newphew’s daughter.
She had a gift her daycare person gave her…
(nice, but…)
IT REQUIRED 3  ‘D’ sized batteries !!!

Now.. I keep every battery size there is in-stock
at my house… but I haven’t needed a huge ‘D’ battery
in 20 years  !!!  The only current use I can think of
is for police flashlights (the ones they hit you with) !
ADDITIONALLY.. 3 ?   3 BATTERIES ?
They are sold in pairs, or even numbers…
THEY FORCE YOU TO BUY MORE THAN YOU NEED !

IT’S A CONSPIRACY !!!

THE BASTARDS !!!


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http://www.TotalOldies.ning.com

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There was this great ‘expose’

on the history channel…

All about a ‘James Bond-ian’, bar-restaurant,
spanning 3 buildings,
chock full of secret passages & hidden elevators,
with various city themes,
and a real amusement park feel for fans of the genre…

THE SHOW IS BETTER…
BUT YOU CAN VISIT THEIR SITE
at

http://www.safe-house.com/
(keep it under your hat)
(for obvious reasons the location is not listed)


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Gore predicts NO polar ice by 2014 ?

I don’t have the conceit that man has the ability
to make THAT much a difference to the earth…
which has gone thru cycles before…
(there’s been an ice age or 2 before man was here)
I DO agree we don’t have to pollute as much as we do.
You don’t put the latrine facilities upstream from your camp.

I FIND THE PROSPECT OF NO POLAR ICE EXCITING !!!
THINK OF THE OPPORTUNITY !!!
I’m hoping the archeologists and other ‘earth’ scientists
are gearing up for the possibility…
access to preserved, before un-reach-able history !!!
REMNANTS of the past, unique-ness covered by ice
for millennia could be re-discovered,
presenting more than a glimpse into the earth’s past !!!
(perhaps some frozen animals with ‘meat’ on them !!!)

WOW !!!

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WHO’S SAVING WHAT ?
(and for whom?  someone always seems to make money)

It always amazes me that politicians
have the ‘balls’ to claim fiscal responsibility
for such things as saving money thru energy savings
(or water, or any utility).

USING LESS OF ANYTHING IS GOOD…
BUT SAVING MONEY ?

The down-side of conservation
is that if use-age goes down, cost goes up !!!

In my lifetime, after every dry summer,
with forced conservation of usage of water…
the water companies have complained about
lost revenue and asking price increases to offset them !!!

PAY ME NOW or PAY ME LATER

BUT YOU WILL PAY !!!


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http://forgottenhits60s.blogspot.com/

GO TAKE A LOOK AT FORGOTTEN HITS…
(They’re not fussy… I’m even allowed to post with the BIG SHOTS!)


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some people don’t want to pay…

the winter, the cold, the snow here…
the devastatingly lethal cold in europe…
KINDA TAKE YOUR MIND OFF GLOBAL WARMING !

but getting back to…
WHO’S SAVING WHAT FOR WHO ?

My 85 year old mother would rather slip-and-slide
on her icy sidewalks than throw down salt
to melt the ice and make it safer for her old bones…

THE REASON ?

The salt ruins the cement !!!
JESUS EFFIN’ CHRIST !!!
WHO IS SHE SAVING THE SIDEWALKS FOR ?
SHE IS 85 YEARS OLD !!!
Like she never heard of a broken hip from a fall ?
Like the ‘new’ people (god forbid)
will hesitate in the least to salt the ice ?

IF THE CEMENT GETS RUINED…
I’LL GET YOU NEW CEMENT !!!

(old people got their ways)

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THE ‘NEW YEAR’ IS GOING TO BE
MORE OF THE ‘OLD YEAR’ !!!



IT DOES LOOK MIGHTY FAMILIAR !!!

(thanks to aquara for EYE & PIE CHARTS)

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for the NEW YEAR ?

Dance like it hurts,

Love like you need money,

Work when people are watching.

- Scott Adams

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CHRISTMAS IS OVER…

(even for ME & the girl locked in my basement)

SHE DRESSED FOR SUCCESS…
very seasonal,
FOR THE LONG, LONG WAIT TILL XMAS !

IT WAS GREAT WHILE IT LASTED…and lasted… and lasted !!!

SUCCESS ?   MISSION ACCOMPLISHED !!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR !!!

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COMMENTS ABOUT R.I.P. RENFIELD???

opposing opinions are welcome,
but since i’m the only employee of RIP,
you’re wasting your time…

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OCCASION RIP BANNERS & ‘SPECIAL’ GRAPHICS PROJECTS
by staff artist
TISH (PILLBUG)
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>>>>>TELL YOUR FRIENDS<<<<<

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