†RIP Renfield #524 – IT’S HALLOWEEN !!! †

***I PERSONALLY VOUCH FOR THE INTEGRITY, ACCURACY,
AND HONESTY OF ALL ITEMS IN RIP***

(except for the stuff I make up, lie about,
or receive mis-information about)

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Don’t be a stranger,  you can contact me at…
RIPRenfield@aol.com

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† RIP Renfield #524 – IT’S HALLOWEEN !!!  †
October 31, 2009

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OKAY…
It’s Halloween ‘proper’ now…
the 2nd Halloween banner is up
(ONE TO GO)
and she can be MY cleaning lady ANYTIME !!!

Don’t eat all the ‘good’ candy
when the kids aren’t looking…
(sometimes they count)

AT LEAST CLEAN YOURSELF UP
BEFORE THEY CATCH YOU…



(but not before I catch you)

_________________________

everyday is Halloween for some people…
(at least they dress that way)

R.I.P
Capt. Lou Albano

That’s Lou on the left…

The Captain was an American professional wrestler, manager & actor.
Throughout his 42-year career, Albano guided 15 different tag teams
and four singles competitors to championship gold.
A unique showman, with elongated beard, rubber band facial piercings,
and loud outfits, he was the forefather of the 1980s
Rock ‘n’ Wrestling Connection. Collaborating with Cyndi Lauper,
Albano helped usher in wrestling’s crossover success
with a mainstream audience. Capitalizing on his success,
he ventured into Hollywood with various tv, film, & music projects.

Capt. Lou was at the top of his game & fame
when he appeared as the father in Cyndi Lauper’s
GIRLS JUST WANT TO HAVE FUN video…

Had he been a few years younger he’d have easily
ridden the crest of the professional wrestling explosion
( who wants to see an old man get slapped around? )
that was ushered in as he ventured into other projects…

______________________

WHO NEEDS TO SCAM ?
as long as we have ambulance chasing lawyers…

I was involved in a car accident…
I was sitting in a parked car
and someone backing out of a parking space
floored the gas pedal by mistake…
good thing the wheels were ‘cut’ all the way…
the car zoomed out and did a horse-shoe turn !
I had my door open and the front of her car
hit the edge of my open door, bending the edge a bit…
I was extremely lucky to still be in the car,
and even luckier that she didn’t ram me !
But the guy standing behind my door, talking to me,
didn’t fare so well…
Miraculously he wasn’t crushed (2 inches more, who knows?).
All I got was an adrenaline rush…
he ended up with a concussion and some pains…
(he’s fine… but I would have written him a wonderful RIP tribute)

I  TOLD  THAT  STORY
because it explains something I couldn’t !!!
To me, it was a non-event.. no big deal…
But, a few weeks later… I got a letter from a lawyer… an ad.
Then another, and another…
Usually they’ll show up like that if you’ve
been arrested or ticketed for some offense !

I was figuring someone in my house had gotten into
a fender bender they didn’t tell me about,or had gotten a ticket !

TOOK ME A LONG TIME TO FIGURE OUT IT WAS
THE ACCIDENT I WAS PERIPHERALLY INVOLVED IN !!!

Maybe I should tell them about the back pain
I’ve had ever since the accident ?

______________________

Geez…

that woman in the PROGRESSIVE INSURANCE
commercials is EVERYWHERE !!!

IS SHE REALLY THAT EFFECTIVE
AS THE FACE OF THE COMPANY ?
(I even saw a full-size cut-out of her at an office)

SHE MUST BE MAKING A FORTUNE !!!

Which reminds me of another ‘face-of-the-company’
who blew his fortune because his company
had a zero-tolerance policy when it came to drugs…
(the recreational kind)

” DUDE, YOU’RE GETTING A DELL !!! ”


DUDE… YOU COULD HAVE HAD A FORTUNE !!!

__________________

Inspired by RON BENNINGTON
from RON & FEZ (xm-sirius satellite radio)
regurgitated and interpreted by ME !!!


I’m going to get controversial for a bit…
To me, I see no controversy, only logic…
but if you take a position,
there’s a good chance someone will take offense…

GETTING THINGS DONE ?

GAY versus CHRISTIAN RIGHT
(not about policy)

The difference between the two,
when it comes to getting things done,
is  ORGANIZATION !!!
That’s what gives the christian right it’s power !
Gays seem to want their causes implemented
because they should, not because they worked for it !
THEY ARE LAZY !!!
Their displeasure is known ONLY after the fact…
Llike proposition 8 in California, who was knocking on doors?
And who was whining when the door-to-door campaign worked ?

OBAMA IS STRUGGLING…
Do gays mobilize and help him ?
Help put him over-the-top on some OTHER issue,
suddenly everyone knows your power, and you are OWED !

THE GAY MARCH ON WASHINGTON, DC ?
The crowd looked pretty,
but just marching was a slap at Obama’s administration !
DOES THAT ENDEAR THEM TO OBAMA ?

THEN…
The christian right is asking people to boycott
PEPSI products because Pepsi made a donation
to a ‘gay friendly’ organization !

Hmmm… WOULDN’T IT HAVE BEEN NICE
FOR GAYS TO SUPPORT PEPSI ?
March on Washington wearing Pepsi logos ?
Drinking pepsi exclusively in front of the media ?
Hell.. each one of the marchers should have brought
cases of pepsi to the march…
You don’t drink it ?
Spill it on the White House grass and kill it !!!
BUY IT BY THE TRUCKLOAD
TO SHOW THE ‘GAY POWER’ OF THE POCKETBOOK !!!

IF 1% OF ESTIMATED GAYS BUY A FEW CASES
THERE WILL SURELY BE A SPIKE IN PEPSI SALES
AND PEPSI WILL KNOW WHICH CUSTOMERS,
AND CAUSES TO CATER TO !!!

IF THE CHRISTIAN BOYCOTT COSTS THEM SALES ?
GUESS WHO’S ASSES THEY’LL BE KISSING ?

It was bold of Pepsi to get involved…
they’re in the business to sell soda,
not pick sides on a political hot potato !

BUT IT’S GIMME, GIMME, GIMME
by the gays…
They don’t want the rights they claim they want
if it takes effort & mobilization on their part !!!
(unless it’s marching in a gay parade with their ‘junk’ hanging out)


MOST THINGS TAKE HARD WORK
& SO FAR THEIR IS AN UN-WILLINGNESS HERE !!!


AND IF THEY DON’T WANT IT THAT BADLY,
WHY SHOULD THE REST OF THE COUNTRY CARE ?
There are other causes & problems to worry about…

____________________

PRETTY GOOD HALLOWEEN COSTUME…
I’D VOTE FOR HER…

SHOW  OFF !!!



but really…
A plastic face? (plastic boobs too?)

I’m thinking the whole, empty, ‘mannequin’ head is plastic !!!
GOOD THING SHE HAS OTHER ‘QUALITIES’…
I’ll bet she runs into lotsa ‘nice’ guys every day !

_____________________

LATE-NITE-TALK-TV ?

I got tired of Johnny Carson
when he got tired of the show and went to an hour a nite.
Pulling the star routine… he lost all spontaneity !
Letterman NEVER did it for me.
Nor did Conan O’brien, Jimmy Fallon,
any of the Daily Show guys & especially Dick Cavett !!!
although Craig Ferguson has the ‘energy’…
(but I don’t… not to be a follower that late anyway)

I THINK THE GENRE HAS BEEN PRETTY MUCH
BEATEN TO DEATH !!! (like everything else on tv)

Although, I wouldn’t mind see-ing 8pm re-runs of old
Steve Allen, Mike Douglas, or even Merv Griffin shows !

BUT…
I find myself being intrigued by the commercials
(especially during the baseball playoffs)
heralding the near-arrival of the 11pm…
GEORGE  LOPEZ  SHOW  !!!
I think he may have something to prove
and actually work to be different (and entertaining) !
I’m assuming him getting a large spanish audience
that should protect him from early cancellation !
AND GIVE HIM TIME TO SELL HIMSELF
AND ATTRACT THE REST OF THE AUDIENCE !!!
(plus 11 pm is the perfect time to sample him)
AND MAYBE HURT THE BIG GUYS !!!


I’LL BE CHECKING GEORGE OUT…
(at least in the beginning, then ’slam’ him if I tire of him?)

____________________

MY GOOD LUCK ?

Fingers crossed… X
My daughter with the connections…
is going VIP for Halloween weekend at the
CHILLER THEATER AUTOGRAPH SHOW…
(and then drink with all of them later)

I have been trying (unsuccessfully) to get ANN-MARGRET
to send an autographed pic, for a guy I work with… who is retiring…
and I’ve been trying for the last year !

He’s been singing her praises for decades !!!
I even photoshopped him a VIVA LAS VEGAS pic
with him (instead of Elvis) twisting with Ann !
I did it for him years ago… he still has it hanging !!!
(He jokes back at me about Kellie Martin)

I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE A COOL SEND-OFF FOR HIM !
I’ve been writing snail-mail & email, trying to get her attention.

I’M SHOCKED AT THE COINCIDENCE OF HER BEING
HERE IN NEW JERSEY, AND ACCESSIBLE…
AT THE FIRST SHOW SHE’S EVER DONE…
AT THE ONLY TIME I’VE EVER NEEDED HER !!!
(Husband Roger Smith will be there too)

I’ll let you know if we pull-it-off !!!

___________________

I love clocks, and timers, and alarms…

I have them all over the place…
reminder alarms for the wash, tv recording,
bedtime satellite radio recording…
just about anything you can think of…
(there’s always something ‘beeping’ in my house)


SO THIS CHANGING-THE-CLOCKS BY AN HOUR
TWICE A YEAR…
IS A REAL PAIN-IN-THE-ASS FOR ME !!!

CAN’T WE JUST SHIFT THE PLANET OR SOMETHING ?

__________________

I  STILL  PREFER  TO  GO  OLD-SCHOOL WITH…

THE CLASSICS…

like the following costume… simple and to the point…

GREAT CUFFS !!!
THEY REALLY ‘MAKE’ THE COSTUME !!!

(shoes?  what shoes?  who needs shoes?)

_____________________

Hey… I had an idea…
if I start telling long, boring stories from my daily life in RIP…
I can fill alot of space without much work…
(like the CSI writers)

PRESCRIPTION  MANAGEMENT…

To keep track of my (very) hidden supply of (fun) drugs…
(not that anyone is ’sneaking’ them)
I always mark the prescripton bottle with remaining number of pills,
along with the date… (using a stick-on label).
I always know how many are left
and can more easily keep track of my abuse….
(and that NO ONE ELSE is abusing MY drugs)

I’ll transfer them, 5 at a time & sectioned into quarters,
into a 2nd pill bottle (hidden elsewhere, but accessible)…
If ANYTHING were to ‘disappear’ or someone help themselves…
I WOULD BE AWARE OF IT !!!

Additionally, this cuts my losses if I were to misplace
the ONLY Rx bottle !!!   (I always have a 2nd source & location)

PS… I JUST CAUGHT SOMEONE ‘DIPPING’ IN…
(and I ain’t happy about it)

_____________________

A  young(?)  man’s …
THOUGHTS TURNED TO FANTASY ?

I’m not exactly sure why.. but…
I’ve been obsessing over the idea of being with
a pale-skinned blond woman…
dressed ONLY in black panties…


and wearing a green-flowery patterned
SAFARI  HELMET !!!

(or white helmet)

Footware optional…
(big, clunky ‘commuter girl’ running shoes might work)

I’m thinking variations of this are
common fantasies shared by most ALL men…
(minus the panties, hat, and shoes?)

_____________________

Tish (pillbug) recently turned-me-onto
POMPLAMOOSE
(translates from the french as… grapefruit)

singing ladies (beyonce  cover)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oIr8-f2OWhs&NR=1

The video is VERY professional looking (and sounding).
The part that I love is how it looks like a group of people,
following a dream (on a shoestring)…
(IT LOOKS LIKE ALOT OF FUN THEY WAY THEY DO IT !!!)
taking their product out to the people on the internet,
coming up with merchandising items… ie.. soap…

AND IT MAKES ME THINK OF MY OWN EFFORTS
WITH RIP Renfield ALL THESE YEARS…

I would go so far as to say that they
mirror my efforts and
are following the same road as I …

EXCEPT THAT THEY HAVE ABILITY & TALENT !!!

To really hear her fantasic voice…
try this one too…  LA VIE EN ROSE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vsMIuuV05uc

(a sound like this makes me angry at what God gave me)

OH.. ONE MORE SONG-VIDEO TO CHECK OUT…
I caught this one at the end of a re-union movie for
DEAD LIKE ME

METISSE – BOOM BOOM BA (really)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uox3jiV-4zA

____________________

http://forgottenhits60s.blogspot.com/

GO TAKE A LOOK AT FORGOTTEN HITS…
(They’re not fussy… I’m even allowed to post with the BIG SHOTS)

________________________

I played a few songs for a co-worker…
the POMPLAMOOSE ones…
and one by METISSE…
(that one was at the end of the return to DEAD LIKE ME)

SHE LOVED THEM.. AND ASKED…
WHERE DO YOU FIND THESE SONGS ?

Hmmmm… now that’s a story…

About 2 weeks ago…   I had a dream… an early morning one…’
I was with some guy.. a buddy I suppose… in his house…
he sent me thru a door to another room…
(big heavy wood, old house-type door),
when I entered, there was this young girl there… (17-19?)
In my dream, I think it could have been his sister.
A plain blonde, leaning to the cute side,
us standing face-to-face.. me, a head taller…
she and I had a nice, long chat…
Very pleasant and made a strong impression on me… VERY strong !!!
I woke with it being as real as any memory in my head !
I could not make this person up.. she must exist somewhere…
and it was on my mind for days…
(she hasn’t returned to any dreams yet)
I’M FAIRLY SURE I’LL RUN INTO HER ONE DAY !
(maybe in the real world?)

So, one boring saturday nite, I did the TRUMAN SHOW thing…
instead of cutting out facial features from magazines and assembling,
I google imaged, a head, hair, mouth, nose, eyes…
and put them together in a ‘choppy’ kinda way…
and tried to get the image in my head on ‘paper’…
(the eyes should be rounder, with ‘bags’ underneath)
((hair blonder, messier, with an off-center part, & whiter skin))

REMEMBER, THIS STORY IS ABOUT
WHERE I FOUND THESE SONGS…

I sent the finished product and the crazy story
to the one person I confide my insanity to…
Tish (Pilbug), all the way on the opposite coast…
(New Jersey to Oregon)
It takes her a few days to get to my mail…
but I DO get a reply… it’s a link…
A link to NATALY DAWN & JACK CONTE’s group
POMPLAMOOSE covering Beyonce’s  ’single ladies’…
It’s not an exact match… but from some angles the 90+% range !!!
NATALY could be the girl in my dream…
(although, the next day, I ‘named’ her LIBBY)

and JACK ?

I asked if she was gay.. (she walked-the-walk)… (maybe I’m picking up on HIM)

(NOT THAT IT MATTERS)

(they never cross into each other’s personal space, no overt affection either)

and Tish wasn’t sure… said NATALY & JACK acted more like
BROTHER and sister, than a couple !!!  (like in my dream?)

GEEZ, LOUISE !!!
Even the ‘heavy’ door is in the video…
leading to their ’studio’ !!!

SO… THE WAY I FOUND THE SONG ?
well it starts with a dream… meeting someone there..
and confiding it to ONLY one person on the opposite coast
who recognizes the ‘police sketch’ as someone
she was recently turned onto…
some wanna-be’s who haven’t hit it big…
but working hard from their lair in Palo Alto, Calif.,
send me the videos, I convert into mp3’s (well, hil does)…
and then I play them for someone at work !

THAT ABOUT COVERS IT !!!
(I TOLD YOU IT’S NOT EASY BEING ME)
((you only have to deal with ONE ‘universe’))

ADDENDUM…
Tish (pilbug) has requested that I stay out of her head !!!
(easier said than done)

___________________

MUSIC, MUSIC, MUSIC
PLAY THE WEEKLY 2-FER…
NAME THAT TUNE QUIZ !!!
——
dave, the exiled !!!

http://en.davidscott.de/

GO TO THE SOURCE, FOLLOW THE LINK

______________________

WELL… THE AMOUNT OF PICS (and the quality of this issue)
MAKE IT NECESSARY TO CALL IT QUITS FOR THIS ISSUE…

HAVE FUN ON HALLOWEEN…
AFTERALL.. it’s only for little kids… and MOSTLY adults !!!

IT’S NOT FOR JUST KIDS ANYMORE…

althought I’ll be the annoyed ‘CANDY-MAN’  running to the door…
and the worst part is that you never know from year-to-year
how many kids will show up !!!
You either have too much candy.. or not enough…
(and it’s never close)

With a Saturday Halloween… and rain questionable….
THERE IS NO WAY TO GAUGE !!!!

The only ones who know how much to buy
are the a-holes registered on the sex-offender list…
with that STAY AWAY pumpkin in their windows !!!

HEY.. REMIND THE KIDS TO STAY AWAY !!!
(from them, not me)

____________________

COMMENTS ABOUT R.I.P. RENFIELD???

opposing opinions are welcome,
but since i’m the only employee of RIP,
you’re wasting your time…

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OCCASION RIP BANNERS & ‘SPECIAL’ GRAPHICS PROJECTS
by staff artist
TISH (PILLBUG)
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>>>>>TELL YOUR FRIENDS<<<<<

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