† RIP Renfield #511 – AUGUST ALREADY? †

***I PERSONALLY VOUCH FOR THE INTEGRITY, ACCURACY,
AND HONESTY OF ALL ITEMS IN RIP***

(except for the stuff I make up, lie about,
or receive mis-information about)

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Don’t be a stranger…
come visit, we can trade ‘adds’ as friend at…

www.MySpace.com/RIPRenfield

or for email subscriptions, or to contact me…
RIPRenfield@aol.com

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† RIP Renfield #511 – AUGUST ALREADY ? †
August 1, 2009

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I’M BACK…

BACK IN THE RENFIELD GROOVE…
YES.. I’M BACK !!!

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ONE OF THE LASTING RESULTS
OF THAT MINI-BREAKDOWN
I HAD BACK AT THE END OF JANUARY ?

I HAVEN’T CUT MY HAIR SINCE THEN…
My goal is to grown all my hair out… same length…
and copy the look of the bad guy in the HARRY POTTER movies…
Lucius Malfoy… the father, not the kid !
I’m planning on still parting a bit to the left…
maybe fluff out the sides a bit, once I have length…
but tied in the back… so all future haircuts
will just be a snip of the pony tail to keep length under control.
I had a great JOHN TRAVOLTA-PULP FICTION ponytail
about 10 or 12 years ago…  I may go back to it…

I’m off work in august for 2 weeks…
(vacation, holiday, whatever)
and I’ll probably have to visit the beauty parlor,
er, my hair stylist (who misses me)…
I’VE GOTTEN QUITE RAGGEDY IN THE LAST 6 MONTHS !

I’m actually enjoying the attention…
people notice and like to comment…
and all I have to say to most of them is…
” FUCK YOU TOO !!! ”

One funny thing… I had a little metal box of hair ties
that I kept as a souveneir of my last (and only) ponytail…
I found it and have it on my dresser to use now…
It’s hot… and even my little ponytail looks better
than hair wildly (and sweaty) all about…
ANYWAY…
No one has touched the box in a decade…
and the other day, now that I started using them again,
I catch my daughter picking up the box
and helping herself to a hair tie (not a scrunchy) !

WHAT THE EFF !!!
She got along very nicely without MY ties for a decade…
(she says mom takes hers)
((what did she use for the last 10 years ? ))
((( EVERYBODY WANTS MY STUFF !!! )))
(RENFIELD, the Trend-setter)

and now I’ll need to replenish soon…
Even though, ONE tie lasts me until I lose it !!!

___________________

SLIM PICKINS…
It’s getting harder and harder
to find someone to RIP dead tribute…
I CAN’T THINK OF THE LAST TIME
THERE WAS A NOTE-ABLE DEATH !!!

HEY… I GOT IT…

R.I.P
SLIM PICKENS

Louis Burton Lindley, Jr., better known as Slim Pickens,
was an American rodeo performer & film and television actor
who epitomized the profane, tough, sardonic cowboy,
but who is best remembered for his comic roles,
notably in Dr. Strangelove and Blazing Saddles.

Pickens credited Dr. Strangelove as a turning point in his career.
Previously he was “Hey you” on sets and afterward
he was addressed as “Mr. Pickens.”
“After Dr. Strangelove the roles, the dressing rooms,
and the checks all started gettin’ bigger.”
He was amazed at the difference a single movie could make.

ANOTHER EXAMPLE OF ‘SLIM PICKENS’…

_______________________

I heard a radio host say out loud
what I had been thinking lately…

He gave George Bush a pass for being a stupid president
because he came into office that way…
HE EXPECTED MORE FROM OBAMA…
AND SAID HE JUST ISN’T SEE-ING IT !

That he’d like to see OBAMA act more presidential
and less a regular guy that you’d have a beer with…
(the way Bush was portrayed, even though an alcoholic)

I THINK OBAMA IS SPREAD TOO THIN…
CONCENTRATE ON ONE MAJOR ISSUE
(the economy?)
AND GO FOR THE OTHER (healthcare)
IN HIS SECOND TERM !!!

Upon expressing these concerns to a young lady…
She said…
” WITH THINGS SO BAD, WHAT’S HE GOING TO DO ? ”

I didn’t say it at the time…
but if Obama wasn’t up to the job…
and didn’t have more of an idea than the average person…
WHY RUN ?
He ran on change, on having the answers…
I’M STILL WAITING !!!
Not for an over-night miracle…
but at least the feeling (real or not)
that we’re headed in the right direction…
NOT BUSINESS AS USUAL !!!
(it’s the same politicians & political bullshit under him)

____________________

NOW FOR SOMETHING IMPORTANT…

THE CITIZENS OF PERTH AMBOY, NJ ARE IRATE !!!

An ordinance has been passed
forcing the many bars in town to close
at 2 am instead of 3 am on fridays & saturdays !!!

THERE’S QUITE THE UPROAR !!!

MY SUGGESTION ?

DRINK  FASTER  !!!

____________________

UNDERAGE CONSUMPTION OF ALCOHOL ?

Milan is getting alot of grief from locals
for creating a law banning the sale & consumption
of alcohol to kids under 16 years old !
NO BRAINER TO ME …
BUT THERE’S A BIT OF AN UPROAR OVER THERE !
It’s claimed that one-third of 11 year olds in the city
have ‘alcohol related problems’…. WOW !!!

(not a good trade-off… but that’s just me)

AMAZING THEY CAN GET ANYTHING DONE OVER THERE !

I’m not concerned for what another country does…
but it got me to wonder…
I saw a tv drama with a message about teen drinking
and how many in the USA are killed every year
due to ‘alcohol related problems’…
(it wasn’t a crazy, big number.. actually modest)

IF IT’S CAUSE-&-EFFECT…
THE STATISTICS OVER THERE SHOULD SHOW
A TREMENDOUS AMOUNT OF YOUNG TEEN DEATHS !!!

IF NOT…
MAYBE WE SHOULD LOWER THE DRINKING AGE !!!
OR ELSE… LOOK TO OTHER REASONS ?


NOT ALL BAD…
ALCOHOL SERVES A USEFUL SOCIAL PURPOSE…
IF NOT FOR ALCOHOL…
HOW WOULD THOSE 2 GIRLS (slim pickens)
EVER FIND HUSBANDS ?

____________________

I haven’t mentioned this in awhile…

BUT TO NEWER READERS…
I’VE HAD THIS THING ABOUT THE NUBMER ‘54′
(I use it in MY (top level) email address & screen name)
turning up everywhere around me & often…

Seemingly too often to be JUST a coincidence…
(ie… Bernie Madoff’s prisoner number ends with ‘-54′)

AND NOW I GOT ANOTHER ‘POINTER’ !!!

There was a commerical for a nearby cemetery…
My grandparents, father, & niece are buried there…
My family owns a dozen more plots there
and plans for us all to be together there (uh-boy) !

From the commercial, I just learned that the street address is
54  INMAN  AVENUE !!!

Hmmm… IS THAT WHERE IT’S BEEN LEADING ME ?

or just an odd coincidence…
(and getting the address the day after the dream I had
conversing with my dead brother-in-law)

KEEP AN EYE OUT IN THE NEWS,
AND ON THE ROAD,
LOTSA 54′S OUT THERE !!!

___________________

MUSIC, MUSIC, MUSIC
and be sure to
PLAY THE WEEKLY 2-FER…

NAME THAT TUNE QUIZ !!!

formerly…. MYSTERY LYRICS !!!
dave, the exiled !!!

http://en.davidscott.de/
GO TO THE SOURCE, FOLLOW THE LINK

or dave’s…

http://www.TotalOldies.ning.com

A GREAT PLACE TO MEET
FOR LIKE-MINDED INDIVIDUALS

___________________

TAX  TAX  TAX

The big ’scare’ headline the other day was
that current plans may end up needing
(at least) the wealthy(?) at a rate of57 %  !!!

MAKES YA GLAD YOU’RE POOR,
and didn’t break your back to be a success !!!

But, unless you grew up on another planet,
you know by now that exhoribant number
was just thrown out there to soften you up
so that a 40% or 45% tax rate would give the illusion
that you’re getting away with something !!!
(big shots insisting on inflationary raises to offset the new tax?)

and once they jam that rate thru…
ones just below it should be adjusted, even if slightly, upward…
(It’s called… FOOT-IN-THE-DOOR)

then comes the definition of WEALTHY…
It’ll start out as making at least a million dollars a year…
then half a million a year… then 250 grand a year…
then 200 grand a year…
until finally (shortly?) the wages of a married couple…
(2 toll takers, 2 postal employees)
will fit the TAX DEFINITION of wealthy !

ISN’T IT GREAT HOW YOU CAN BECOME WEALTHY
WITHOUT EARNING ANY MORE MONEY ?

AND ISN’T IT AMAZING THAT PEOPLE ACCEPT THIS
AND NEVER LEARN TO REALIZE WHAT’S COMING ?

The TRUELY wealthy have another option…
the phrase TAX EXILE comes to mind…
or why expand and create jobs if your return
on your hard work is taxed to ‘death’…
(20 years ago my doctor’s wife gave up her nursing career,
solely on the basis of the tax disadvantages…
wait until factories don’t get expanded, or even more go overseas,
or to states that offer tax deals to the detriment of workers)

I’VE ALREADY READ THAT THIS ‘FORCED’ NATIONAL
MEDICAL PLAN MAKE IT CHEAPER FOR SOME FACTORIES
TO GET RID OF HEALTHCARE ALTOGETHER
AND JUST PAY THE FINE !!!

Foot-in-door?
optional seatbelts, no smoking areas later banned areas…
THEY ONLY NEEDED A SMALL OPENING
TO BE EXPANDED TO CRIMES !

__________________

how it ‘works’ in NEW JERSEY…

Many of you may have read about the 40 or so
corrupt ‘officials’ arrested last week in undercover
operations by the feds here in NJ…

ONE OF THE BEHIND-THE-SCENES ‘ARRANGERS
DIED A FEW DAYS AFTER HIS ARREST…
(suspicious, but not homicide they say so far)

AND  GEE  WHIZ  !!!
THE major newspaper located in ‘crime central’…
gives the guy a glowing, front-page story(?),
more like a memorial… or an obituary from loved ones…
ONE sentence of his actual ‘action’ buried in the story…
Otherwise… he’s compared to Santa Claus, a nice guy,
loved by everyone, got the job done…
(what was his job?  where did he put in his work week?)

INSTEAD OF LAMBASTING HIM FOR ARREST OVER
CRIMINAL ACTIONS, HE WAS PRAISED…

THE STORY WAS DONE IN A TONE THAT WOULD
HAVE BEEN BETTER RESERVED FOR A MOTHER THERESA !!!

THE CORRUPTION IS SO IN-BRED HERE…
THE NEWSPAPERS GIVE THE ‘ARRESTED’
A KIND, COMPLIMENTARY SEND-OFF !!!
(biz-ness as usual)

______________________

http://forgottenhits60s.blogspot.com/

GO TAKE A LOOK AT FORGOTTEN HITS…
(They’re not fussy… They even allow ME to post with the famous)

________________________

OCTO-MOM SIGNS REALITY TV SHOW DEAL ?

Doesn’t sound like a great deal of money…
$250,000 isn’t F-U money…

but I wonder if California will be able
to get reimbursement for ‘welfare’ benefits
paid to her in the past ?

THAT’S THE WAY IT WORKS IN NJ !!!

If paid to the kids… instead of her…
THEY won’t need as much gov’t support…
EITHER WAY… BENEFITS SHOULD BE REDUCED !!!

__________________

sunday  dinner  …
My wife and I sat down to some
hamburgers, little steaks, some shish-kabob-ed veggies…
baked potatoes, and peas…

A NICE MEAL… SOME GOOD CONVERSATION…
Did you know the expression…
ROYAL-pain-in-the-ass
is an american invention ?
IN ENGLAND, SHE CLAIMS IT’S INSULTING !
(to the royal family, in addition to the intended target)

ANYWAY… I DIGRESS…
The meal is finished, she’s moved on…
I’m about to clear the table…
and with a serious look, my wife says…

” BY THE WAY… THERE’S ONLY ONE KLONDIKE
ICE CREAM BAR LEFT IN THE FREEZER ! “

I take a pregnant pause, and reply…
(I got great timing)

” OH.. THEN I INSIST THAT YOU HAVE IT ! “

EVEN SHE HAD TO LAUGH AT THAT…
as if I was ever going to be the ‘eater’ of the Klondike !

___________________

DAMN… A HOT SUNDAY EVENING
and that ONE Klondike ice cream bar is gone !

So I decide to go to the local Carvel-type ice cream store…
I drive past to get gas first…
and see a line extending 20 feel outside the door !!!

I get my gas… double back… the line is STILL long…
but I decide to wait-it-out…
THE PARKING LOT IS PRETTY FULL…
A car pulls out of a parking space just as I enter the lot…
I’ll pull in when he’s past me…
but some jerk decides he wants the parking space
and pulls in front of it (sideways) from the wrong direction,
blocking it, and planning to back in…

AT WHICH POINT I CALL OUT
(I forgot the window was open & he was close by)
” ASS-HOLE !!! ”

I see his head spin around…
(I think he heard me)
AND NOT LOOKING FOR AN ALTERCATION…
I DECIDED I DIDN’T WANT ANY ICE CREAM AFTERALL !

AND DROVE HOME SANS ICE CREAM…

Good thing I left… I’d feel guilty about
beating the shit out of the guy in front of his girlfriend !

EVEN THOUGH MY FAVORITE ICE CREAM PLACE
HAS THIS GREAT PROMOTION…

____________________

dna testing ?

Why DNA test the kid they think might be
Michael Jackson’s son ?
(as a young kid he won a dance-alike contest,
befriended for years and taken in by Michael,
sat with family at the memorial)

None of his OTHER ‘kids’ have his DNA !

__________________

ANYBODY ELSE NOTICE ?

In the movie, THE SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION,
the old guy (brooks) uses the expression…
” EASY-PEEZY-JAPAN-EEZ-EE ”

I’m sure that was a phrase of the day,
more than JUST a rhyme, and insulting at some level…
BUT… I’ve heard part of it… ” EASY-PEEZY ”
used several times in modern day settings…
On tv, radio, and in person…
(and just today… another radio commercial)

I THINK IT’S MAKING A COMEBACK !!!

(JUST HEARD IT AGAIN ON –  BURN NOTICE)

_______________________

but since I’ve been so ‘wordy’
the last few issues…
I have NOTHING else to say this week !!!

SO… HAVE A FANCY DRINK
WITH A PAPER UMBRELLA IN IT
WHILE YOU SIT BY THE POOL…

(bikini bra tops optional)

(I absolutely love that pic & especially the smiley girl on the left)

AND STAY COOL…
COOL, BABY, COOL….

(make sure there’s a body of water near the ‘beach’ you go to)

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COMMENTS ABOUT R.I.P. RENFIELD???

opposing opinions are welcome,
but since i’m the only employee of RIP,
you’re wasting your time…

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OCCASION RIP BANNERS & ‘SPECIAL’ GRAPHICS PROJECTS
by staff artist
TISH (PILLBUG)
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RIP Renfield available on the internet at…
www.RipRenfield.com
or email
RIPRenfield@aol.com

>>>>>TELL YOUR FRIENDS<<<<<

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