† RIP RENFIELD #442 – STILL the FOOL †

***I PERSONALLY VOUCH FOR THE INTEGRITY, ACCURACY,
AND HONESTY OF ALL ITEMS IN RIP***

(except for the stuff I make up, lie about,
or receive mis-information about)

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Don’t be a stranger…
come visit, we can trade ‘adds’ as friend at…

www.MySpace.com/RIPRenfield

or for email subscriptions, or to contact me…
RIPRenfield@aol.com

***************************

† RIP Renfield #442 – STILL the FOOL †
April 5th, 2008

———————————

APRIL 1st HAS COME & GONE
BUT I STILL FEEL THE FOOL !!!
I’d be better off if they made it the ‘NO FOOL’ DAY !!!
I think I COULD do 1 a year !

While I was welcoming spring last week,
Snugs in Wisconsin was puzzled…
seems they have had more snow this past winter
than any since the late 1800’s !!! (with still plenty to contend with)

Sunny skies and 60 degrees in New Jersey coming this week.
and one of the mildest winters ever…
I GUESS IT ALL EVENS OUT !!!

MY BACKYARD…

(nah… not ‘green’ like this (yet)… I’m just effin’ with ya)

Oh.. and to fill in the casual RIP reader
about the inner machinations of the corporation…

MY SYSTEM ?
Due to further demands on my time… Most note-ably..
the addition of www.RIPRenfield weekly issue postings…
I have stopped doing the collage of pics from the current issue…
& cut out the links section.. although links are still included here & there.

The current week’s issue is sent to email subscribers
on Friday evening… (if I could.. I’d wean everyone to the website)
To keep it punctual… I post that same issue Sunday evenings
on the website (the site also has archived issues)…
This way if something comes up on Saturday for me,
it doesn’t interfere with scheduled publication.

It can be a chore being a .. CHARLES FOSTER RENFIELD
(but a system keeps me from overwhelming myself)

Now you know as much as I do…
(probably more)

ONE LAST THING…
The website has a ‘map’ counter…
it posts little red dots in your general area on a tiny atlas…
I would appreciate ALL readers visiting www.RIPRenfield.com
once or twice to get your location noted…
(It’s a vanity thing for me)

THANK YOU

______________________________

Out of the clear blue of the western sky comes…

KIRBY GRANT aka SKY KING

Kirby Grant, (born Kirby Grant Hoon Jr.),
was a long-time B-movie and television actor.
He is mostly remembered for playing the title role
in the television series Sky King.

Grant, a child-prodigy violinist, continued to pursue music
nd became a professional singer and bandleader.
In 1943, Grant signed with Universal Pictures, where he played
romantic leads in B musicals, and in Abbott & Costello
and Olsen & Johnson comedies.
Universal selected him to replace Rod Cameron
as the studio’s B-Western series star in 1945.
His seven westerns established Kirby Grant as an action star.

This led to Grant starring as Arizona rancher-pilot Schuyler “Sky” King,
who fought bad guys and rescued people with his airplane.
Sky’s first plane was a Cessna T-50, & later a more modern Cessna 310B.
Sky’s airplanes were named “Songbird”.
Sky and his niece “Penny” lived on the “Flying Crown Ranch”.

AN ‘INSIDE’ PRODUCTION TRICK OF THE DAY…
The series called for Grant to wear the same outfit on every show.
That prompted many fans to wonder if the character owned
any other clothes. Actually, this was a common practice in the
early days of TV production: many series regulars always wore the
same outfits so different episodes could be filmed at the same time,
and file footage could be added to new footage without anyone noticing.

Grant did little acting after the show ended although he
and co-star Gloria Winters were in demand
for personal appearances at fairs and aviation events.

In reference to Kirby Grant Hoone (Sky King)
NOT having a pilot license issued by the FAA;
is it possible the pilot’s license were issued under his birth name.
There were many reports of Sky King (Hoone) flying airplanes at air shows.
And reports of Mr. Hoone flying with other pilots
that have stated he was a good pilot.

BY THE STRANGEST OF COINCIDENCES…
Kirby is interred in Missoula, Montana…
which just so happens to be the hometown, & place of marriage,
of a certain lawyer that married a certain Kellie
that I used to write about extensively…
A VERY ODD COINCIDENCE !!!

_____________________________

I just can’t vote
for a lie-ing sack-of-shit !!!

Which is a dilemma,
considering that describes ALL politicians !!!

Unless they force me into it…
I’m easing off on politics…

I really don’t have a horse-in-the-race…
(except being anti-Hillary)
The only choice they give you is…
WHICH PARTY GETS TO STEAL FROM YOU !!!

and the only time politics pays off for you…
is if the elected one is in your debt…
and a little ’something’ comes your way…

AND AS FOR PRESIDENT…
It should be like being the QUEEN of ENGLAND…
a ceremonial post… not a ‘ruling’ one…
It’s not like the president can do much without congress !
(let the prez kiss babies & make appearances.. keep him out of trouble)

You’d think with a democratic congress…
the USA would be out of Iraq already….
or is it politically expedient to keep the ‘war’ going
until Bush is out of office and then act ?

One party working against the other…
you succeed, we dismantle… and vice versa…
SO WE, AS A WHOLE, NEVER GET ANYWHERE…

IT’S ALL ABOUT GETTING CREDIT !!!
(or making sure no one else gets credit

DOES IT MATTER WHO IS IN CHARGE ?
NOT A WHIT !!! (<–good word)
(unless you’re connected & get a ‘taste’)

_______________________________

MYSTERY LYRICS – the Game !!!
to play the game… just register at the link…
(or take advantage of the site’s OTHER gems)

www.MysteryLyrics.info

you will be emailed a clue and a lyric nitely…
you are free to participate or not, as often or as little as you like…
and make whatever comment or contribution you choose…
it’s interesting and alot of fun…
Lyric Festival
TEST YOUR MUSICAL KNOWLEDGE….

and due to his personal relationship with CARO…
GERMAN-INTERNATIONAL ROCK LEGEND !!!
Dave, of Mystery Lyrics, is the webmaster of her fan site…
Still under construction… but getttin’ ‘pretty’…
IT’S WORTH CHECKING OUT…

http://www.caro-fans.com/
(info, audio, & video)

—————————————-

THIS IS LOCAL POLITICS… IT DOESN’T COUNT…

WE HAVE A MAYOR
WHO LIKES TO GET THINGS DONE
(he may have ambition for higher office)

HERE’S A COPY OF THE EMAIL I SENT HIM…
LET’S SEE IF HE THINKS IT WORTH HIS ATTENTION…

I’ve noticed for a very long time
that I get no advantage in front of my home and most of my street
from the street cleaners that come by twice a month…
The problem ?
The truck has come and gone by 7 am
when most of the residents have not left for work yet…
Seems to be a real waste of time to do it at that hour…
It would make more sense to ‘clean’ the main streets…
where resident parking is at a minimum…
perhaps schedule the street sweepers to do them first and early…
and the residential neighborhoods after 8 or 9 am…
IN ADDITION…
They come by with the street cleaner on garbage day !!!
So in addition to cars… there are garbage cans to go around !!!

It would be a much more efficient use of resources…
and a much cleaner town…
I see the ‘wet’ outline of the truck mostly in the middle of the street
swerving in ..over and over again to get what they can…

It’s not the truck, it’s not the driver… it’s the parked cars in the way…
(and the refuse put to the curb for collectoin)
It’s not always possible to leave the front of your house free of cars…
anyone can park there…
Especially if they want THEIR portion of the street swept…

thank you…

SEEMS TO MAKE SENSE, NO ?
IT’S ONLY SCHEDULING, IT SHOULD BE AN EASY ONE…

___________________________

I CAN’T HELP MYSELF…
one more political ‘jab’…

In hotly contested Pennsylvania,
Hillary was convincing them that she was a Philadelphian
through & through…
CLAIMING THAT SHE WAS LIKE ROCKY !!!
(hometown hero boxer from the movie series)

DOESN’T SHE REALIZE THAT ROCKY
LOST THE CHAMPIONSHIP TO A BLACK MAN ?
(I guess she IS like Rocky)

BUT WILL SHE ‘GET’ THE GIRL ?

I DO see the ‘resemblance’…

OBAMA’S REALLY BEAT THE CRAP OUT OF HER !!!

It probably would have been a better idea
to reference the SERIES of movies
as opposed to JUST the character !!!

from late nite tv?
The very important presidential primary in Pennsylvania
which Obama needs to bury Hillary,
and she NEEDS (badly) to make it a fight… is getting interesting…
with Hillary’s gigantic lead (in the polls) being ‘halved’
the all important endorsement of the Governor of the state
has gone to Obama !!! He claims that he was urged to support
Obama by his 4 daughters who made up his mind !

Due to the influence of his 4 daughters…
he is also endorsing Hannah Montana for vice-president.

___________________________

THIS ONE IS SEX… NOT POLITICS….

Former Governor Elliot Spitzer…
is showing some better taste in chicks…

I like this one alot better than the other press hog !

Some guy at the news stand was criticizing Spitzer
because he liked to ‘watch’ !!!

Criticize ? Hey.. I like to watch too !!!
I’ve been known to stop in at…
www.Redtube.com & www.Youporn.com
(try redtube 7475)

IN FOR A PENNY, IN FOR A POUND…
(as long as he pays his bill)

Spitzer really ‘killed’ the story by resigning…
(Clinton could have saved us years of bullshit)

OH.. and having a ‘randy’ lieutenant governor in the wings…
with even MORE ‘dirt’ sure helped to take the pressure off Elliot !!!

___________________________

I WONDER IF SPITZER PLAYED BABY GAMES ?
I like peek-a-boob…
another favorite ‘baby’ game is…
(how big?) -” SO BIG !!! “

_____________________

A LITTLE LATE…
but there was a crane that collapsed in NYC
while it was being extended even further…
THERE WERE SEVERAL DEATHS !
The building inspector was lax…
actually the city inspector didn’t show up alot…
but that didn’t stop his ‘favorable’ reports…
LOOKS LIKE HE’S GOING TO JAIL !

but the part that made an impression on me was…
the head of his department on the news declaring…
” ZERO TOLERANCE ON BAD INSPECTORS-INSPECTIONS “

HUH ?
Where was she BEFORE the tragedy ?
Why was there no ‘zero tolerance’ in place BEFORE ?
From her attitude… I don’t think HER job is in jeopardy !
SHE’S AS SHOCKED AS EVERONE ELSE !!!

SHE SHOULD BE THE FIRST ONE FIRED…
okay.. 2nd one.. after the inpsector…
BUT IT HAPPENED ON HER ‘WATCH’…
SHE SHOULD BE HELD LIABLE !!!
(unless this was the ONLY bad inspector on a ‘cracker-jack’ team)
(and for $52,000 a year salary… inspectors may ’suplement’ it)
(on a regular, on-going basis?… that the ‘top’ is aware of, but ignores?)

_______________________

THE INSPECTOR HAD A BAD DAY ?
SO DID I …

In kicking off a beloved running shoe… I stumbled..
and heard a ‘crack’ !!!
(I never knew a shoe could make a noise like that)

I found that the ’seal’ (glue?) that connects the sole to the top
around the inside of the arch/heel had been compromised
and was only a matter of time before my beloved,
no-longer-made sneex would deteriorate further…

A google search on ’sneaker repair’ gave me a solution…
Buy a tube of bathtub sealer (100% silicon)
and ‘glue’ it back to original equipment standard.
(it HAS to be flexible, and soft enough to step on)

SO… I used an ample amount of the sealer…
pressed in place for several minutes to help it set…

and as an added setting agent…
I put the heel of the shoe under a heavy table leg overnight…
and I’m letting it ’set’ for another few days…

AFTER ALL THAT I MENTIONED IT TO A CO-WORKER
(all proud of myself)
He said… ” It’ll never hold, you should have used… blah, blah, blah.)

THE BASTARD…
WHY DIDN’T HE SPEAK UP BEFORE !!!

I added a final ‘line’ of superglue… just in case…
(I’ll have an update once I start wearing them again)

___________________________

That sneaker business gave me a terrible headache…

FOR RELIEF ?
It always pays to go to a professional…

in seconds… I forgot ALL about it !!!

BUT THE CURE SURE RUINED MY SEX LIFE !!!
SEEMS I’M THE ONLY ONE WHO KNOWS
HOW TO ‘SCRATCH-THE-ITCH’…
as shown by the computer’s ideal match for me…

_________________________

I GUESS THE WORD IS GETTING OUT…

I’ve just been invited to submit my ‘run-down’
to be included in THE BILTMORE’S WHO’S WHO
AMONG EXECUTIVES & PROFESSIONALS
(and also in the 2008 Honors Edition) !!!

My candidacy was formally approved March 6th !!!
Then they go on to embarass me with praise
for my accomplishments & background…

They end by saluting MY accomplishments
and welcoming me to their WHO’S WHO ROSTER !!!

and you people thought no good
would come from my ‘dick’ jokes !!!

I WOULD LIKE THE COMMITTEE TO KNOW
THAT NOT ONLY DO I THANK THEM…
BUT MY DICK THANKS THEM TOO !!!

___________________________

if movies are your forte….

MYSTERY MOVIE QUOTE WAV’S ARE E-MAILED DAILY….
a Wav & a Clue, is it New ?, a Classic ?, or a Rarity ?…
to get in on the fun (and the mailing list)
email —> TheOneBuff@aol.com
OR USE THE LINK—> Sign Me Up For Buffery
join the BUFFERY, AND GET BUFFER-IZED…
(remember to open your e-mailboxes to game senders.)

___________________________

eggs

I was ‘missing’ having eggs in my house…
My wife, for some reason, never before…
brought home 2 dozen (organic) BROWN eggs…

I WILL NOT EAT BROWN EGGS !!!

I PREFER WHITE EGGS, THANK YOU !!!
(as God intended eggs to be)

It took about 3 weeks or so before I broke down
and bought 2 dozen WHITE eggs…
Made myself a nice cheese omlet & toast for dinner that night !

Yeah, yeah, yeah… I KNOW…
There is no difference and they taste the same !
(it’s the principle)

DO YOU REMEMBER A LITTLE ‘FAD’ A FEW YEARS BACK..?
KETCHUP.. instead of red, it was purple, or green ?

It tasted exactly the same, but it looked awful !!!

It was NOT a ‘hit’.. I’m not sure if they even make it anymore !!!
(you shouldn’t mess with Mother Nature.. or MY friggin’ eggs!)

________________________

first – the news story
then the commentary…

First Moon Pictures From Japan’s Kaguya

October 11, 2007 – The Japanese space agency JAXA has confirmed
that their lunar orbiter Kaguya is now firmly in orbit around the Moon.
By the time Kaguya is in its final science orbit,
it will be able to capture images of the lunar surface at a resolution of 1-metre.
It will also be recording high-definition television images of the surface,
which should look just amazing in the eventual documentaries.

MY THOUGHTS…?
Hi-res digital photos have been acquired for nearly 5 months.
Wouldn’t it be an extremely interesting thing
for the probe to take photos of American moon landing sites ?
Perhaps the US could have worked out an agreement, in trade,
for PROOF, undeniable proof, that the moon landings DID take place,
and silencing, one & for all, the conpriracy, ahem, persons ?

AND IF THE LANDING SITES WEREN’T THERE…
WHOA BOY !!!

__________________________

IN OTHER EXTRA-TERRESTRIAL NEWS…

A planet, 63 million light years away…
has been found to have methane in it’s atmosphere !!!

SHOULDN’T SCIENTISTS BE LOOKING FOR MORE
IMPORTANT THINGS THAN ‘FART’ PLANETS ?

______________________

BIG BOOBS .. LITTLE TINY ONES…
I’M NOT FUSSY…

I like to get to know a girl…
talk to her… find out her name…
You can tell alot about a girl from her name…

Ivana Fukalot

____________________

THE 60s SHOP
You can now read great stories, and add comments… at…
http://forgottenhits60s.blogspot.com/
I suggest bookmarking that link and checking it daily…
AND DON’T BE AFRAID TO ADD YOUR COMMENTS
TO THOSE OF THE FAMOUS & IN-FAMOUS !!!
_______________

Featuring songs & artists that you just don’t hear anymore !
(and special original music series as well)
Sound interesting???

An extensive BOYCE & HART series
is currently running… with celebrity comments…

(Stephen Stills & Peter Tork were not only room-mates,
they were competitors for the same role on THE MONKEES)

_________________________

Prostitution and politics is not really news anymore…
I only bring it up because of ANOTHER yawner of an instance…
the husband of a senator was caught in a prostitution sting round-up…
and the interesting thing?

THE $150 HOOKER HE WAS WITH
WAS, AT LEAST, ON PAR LOOKS WISE
THAN THE SPITZER $1000 an hour WHORE !!!

PERHAPS IT COMES DOWN TO…
WHO CAN SUCK THE CHROME OFF A CAR BUMPER BETTER !!!

________________________

I like pigs.

Dogs look up to us.
Cats look down on us.
Pigs treat us as equals.

Winston Churchill

________________________

SO TO SUM IT ALL UP…

MEN ARE DOGS
MEN ARE PIGS
MEN ARE A-HOLES !!!

and, as a man… I’d like to say…
GUILTY, GUILTY, & GUILTY (as charged)

OINK, OINK… WOOF, WOOF…

Baaa – Bye

_____________________________

COMMENTS ABOUT R.I.P. RENFIELD???

opposing opinions are welcome,
but since i’m the only employee of RIP,
you’re wasting your time…

*******************************

OCCASION RIP BANNERS & ‘SPECIAL’ GRAPHICS PROJECTS
by staff artist
TISH (PILLBUG)
——————————

RIP Renfield available on the internet at…
www.RipRenfield.com
and also featured at…
www.MysteryLyrics.info
and make sure to ’surf’ the site…
follow the links and explore… lots of good stuff…
or visit me at…
www.MySpace.com/RIPRenfield

>>>>>TELL YOUR FRIENDS<<<<<

+++++++++++++++++++++